Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it tonight, I just want you to hold me."


I said, "WHAT??!!





What was that?!"



So she says those words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...



"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."



She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bed?"



Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.



The very next day I though it would be good to take the day off work to spend time with her.





We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a huge department store.





I walked around with her while she tried on Several different very expensive outfits.





She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all.





She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."



Then we went over to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.





Now let me tell you... she was so excited.





She must have thought I was on drugs or something.





I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.



I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine babes."





She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.





Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the check out."



I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No babe, I don't feel like it."



Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"



I then said, "Baby! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."



And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"



Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....





(",)