BENEFITS OF BEING AN INTELLIGENT WOMAN

* We got off the Titanic first.

* We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.

* We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

* We can cry and get off speeding fines.

* We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.

* Taxis stop for us.

* We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

* Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies (you get the point).

* New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

* No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.

* We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

* If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

* We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her butt.

* We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

* If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

* We have the ability to dress ourselves.

* We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

* If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

* There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.* We'll never regret piercing our ears.

* We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

* We'll never discover we've been duped by a Wonderbra.