Funny as ... Ah Forget it.

A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 5:30 after work.

His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in.

"My hair & makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I'm still in my pajamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight! What the hell did you bring him home for?"

"Because he's thinking of getting married."

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Just been beaten up by a busty woman in an elevator.

I was staring at her boobs when she said, “Would you please press 1?”

So I did.

I don’t remember much after that.

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I was thrown out of school for shitting on the teacher’s desk.

My wife said she’ll do parent’s evenings from now on.


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What are the two most important holes in a woman's body? ...

NO. It's not them you dirty bastards it's her nostrils ...

They allow her to breath while she is sucking cock.