Kiss my nose

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the President his daily Iraq briefing. Heconcludes by saying: "Unfortunately, yesterday 3 Brazilian soldierswerekilled.""OH JESUS H CHRIST, NO!" President Bush exclaims. "That's terrible!"His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watchingasthe President sits, head in hands.Finally, the President looks up and asks,"Exactly how many is a brazillion?"

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Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

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It was a meal time during a trip on a small airline in the south. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attended asked the man seated in front of me. "What are my choices?" he asked. "Yes or no," she replied.

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